You know, back when I was a little boy – about six or seven years old – someone quite magical came into my life. It wasn’t the typical magical someone like you see in fairy story books, a wizard with long black robes and pointy hat, nor was it a witchy type of person with crooked nose and warts all over her face that were caused by sticking that long proboscis into steaming vats of who-knows-what-smoky-green stuff. It wasn’t even a hammer wielding dwarf or valiant warrior with a blazing sword. Nope, it wasn’t any of those kinds of magical people.
It was Fred.
Can this Fred perso really do magical things? The answer to that was that he certainly could do magical things. Now, it might not seem magical to you or your friends but he was pretty magical to me and I think once you know Fred it will be really magical to you too.
Now, the first question you’ll likely want to ask is, “Who’s Fred”?
And, you’ve asked the wrong question.
It isn’t “Who’s Fred?” but instead the proper question is “What’s Fred”?
And before I answer that question, there’s a few other, but more important things that have to be dealt with.
Another important question would be “How old is Fred? And, that is a very, very good question. I don’t know the answer to that question. He seemed a lot younger than I was ‘cause he didn’t know a lot of stuff but because he could talk he seemed a lot older. I was six or seven and I just kind of thought he was too.
You might want to ask, “What did this Fred look like?” and that would be an excellent question. Fred was a bit different looking as many magical folks are. He had yellow eyes that seemed as big and round as a full moon and his tongue was really long – he could stick it out and touch his ears with it.
His fingers and toes – he had 4 toes and 4 fingers – were really long and kinda sticky so he could climb walls really easily. Man, he was strong. I’ve seen him lift… well, that’s another story, but he was really, really strong.
He also had green skin but that’s not so unusual once you get to know him. A lot of his friends and relative also had green skin so he looked pretty normal at family birthday parties and the like. He did stick out a bit though at school (yes, we even went to school together).
He wasn’t that tall – about six inches high – but he was the biggest kid in his family so that was OK.
Or, you might even ask, “What’s this Fred really like?” And I’d tell you that Fred was my best friend.
- He got into a LOT of trouble and he dragged me along into it too but we had some really good times as well (we didn’t get caught all the time).
- He is a joker and a prankster (he loved to play tricks on people) and if he could find two ways to do something – he’d pick the one that caused the most excitement.
- He never, ever hurt one of his friends deliberately like some people we know. Fred never hit you or made you take all the blame if it was his fault – or at least he tried not to let you take the blame.
But who would blame a talking frog? Especially when they didn’t know he talked.
A great big (truly huge) awesomely handsome, green with black spots, yellow, bug-eyed, web-footed, sticky- tongued, talking frog who adopted me.
Because it’s true. Fred is a frog.
Wait a minute! You said a frog talks! What? (Click the link above)